Slow and steady

My partner in crime at Fat Camp, we'll call her "N", told me that my recent post describing my body as I see it in summer clothes grossed her out and that I was wrong about how I perceive myself. Isn't it a shame that we beat ourselves up so much? What I see as an imperfection, another doesn't even notice. So "N", thank you. And to all of you reading who now think I look like Gilbert Grape's obese mother...I should explain that I don't look that way.

I'm actually quite healthy. To paint myself in a better picture....I don't smoke (never have), and I rarely drink alcohol. My bad cholesterol is normal and my blood pressure is perfect. I eat organic foods as much as possible, and I only allow myself ONE regular Coke as a treat here and there. I refuse to eat at fast food establishments and I seldom eat cow...I mean red meat. Mooove over cattle. I'd rather eat chicken (free range, organic, happy chickens, thank you!).

However, I have 2 downfalls: Chocolate and Ice Cream. What I wouldn't give to raid a Fannie May chocolate shop or live at Baskin Robbins. It isn't fair. Someone like me who has good habits shouldn't have to work so hard to lose weight. If my only vice is my sweet tooth, why is my body so stubbornly chubby? I hate all skinny women right now. Especially those like Pamela Anderson who have 2 kids, no stretchmarks and quip "Hee hee...I've never worked out a day in my life..." and look like Mattel's Frankenstein of a woman, Barbie.

I HATE YOU, PAMELA ANDERSON!

No one wants to WAIT and WAIT and WAIT for anything these days. We get pizzas at our door in 30 minutes, oil changes in 10 minutes and everything we want is at our fingertips thanks to the internet. Instant gratification. I'm the first to admit I want what I want, and I want it NOW. Sometimes I get it. Other times I pine for what I want and dream it will be mine one day. When it comes to my body, I feel like I'll be a perpetual weight loss wannabe. Sadly, I give up too easily because I don't want those extra pounds to come off in 20 weeks. I want to see it all come off in 4 weeks. So do you...I know you do. Don't lie. That's why there's liposuction...for impatient people like me! But I can't afford lipo. But I WILL get a tummy tuck someday!

I've come to realize that the healthy, toned, sexy and less-of-Jess body is not something I can get by skipping meals, trading a well thought out dinner for a meal replacement shake, or even running once a week. I have to make a lifestyle change by being CONSISTENT and following through with it to achieve proper results.

I've never had to work hard at looking good, and I say that with sincerity, not arrogance. My pre-baby body was pretty rockin' 8 years ago and I didn't appreciate it. I embrace my newfound curves thanks to my babies, but I can be a better me. It's just gonna be a slow and steady journey.

So, as I enter week 3, I'll take my 1.4 pound loss with a smile. At least I know this body is getting good food and the attention it deserves. All I can do is try!